My People

Of all the beasts - both mythical, and real life, family sticks out for me as the gnarliest.
The first time you cry, you're usually naked and surrounded by your family.
This is how vulnerable these people make us.
Some would call family a great masterpiece. Others, not so much...
By dictionary definition,
family is a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head, but also a unit of a crime syndicate (such as the Mafia) operating within a geographical area.
Call it a household, a horde or a herd, family will often stop at nothing to help or hurt one another.

My family isn't the worst, naturally if you asked me I'd tell you they're the fucking best. Because they are. My Mother is early fifties, traveling saleswoman with her own business. She has put herself next to last for so long and still raises my 25-year-old brother like her baby boy. I think a lot of Mothers and Sons have unique relationships no one could ever replace. The same goes for a loving Father-Daughter bond. Some people know this, many do not.
We have fun, we have flaws and we're far from perfect. That's family.

In our house, we grew up watching The Flintstones and Home Improvement. Mom said The Flintstones was her favourite cartoon growing up so she shared it with her children. Her brother preferred Aquaman and Super Friends. His kids watched Twilight and Breaking Bad.
There is no denying it - TV does a great job of showing how family will go to the ends of the Earth for each other. Some call it tradition; simply routine. 

Others have no experience of a protective family.
What I take away, is how we all seem to ignore the faults and dramas within our own homes, yet can't seem to get enough of fictional families with dysfunctional and tumultuous dynamics, i.e. Arrested Development, Desperate Housewives, Dynasty, Shameless, Sons of Anarchy,  Weeds, and as if we even cared about Keeping up with the Kardashians. Oh television, you glorious bastard.

We grew up having dinner at Grandma's on Sundays. The smell of the house as you walked in was wicked, really. Something was usually on the TV but neither Grams or Gramps had glanced at it since they turned it on that morning. From 3:00 p.m. we'd stay six, seven, eight hours.
Around the kitchen table is where all the ideas and dialogues collide. 

But in the background, TV was on.

TV was a central part of the home. Was it magic or coincidence?
I'm picturing Danny Devito and Rhea Pearlman as Harry & Zinnia Wormwood, sitting with a TV tray in between them and the game show network. Danny Devito grabs Mara Wilson's face, forcing her to stare at some guy compete for cash. Beautiful women use large paint brushes to cover him in glue before he's sent into one of those wind tunnel capsules. The TV explodes. Matilda says, "I didn't do it." Zinnia thinks it's because it's a cheap set. Harry says, "It's not a cheap set, it's a stolen set."

Like Full House, Uncle Joey is our Mom's little brother, Uncle Joe, in real life. My brother and I looked to him like a Father figure. My Grandpa basically raised me, (my Mom's words) and ultimately became the man who we continue to look up to today. And in between our parents' separation and losing Dad when we were kids, our family grew.

I have a Step-Dad and three stepbrothers who each have children in the flesh or if not, fur. We get along at family gatherings. Like anyone, we have our ups and our downs. Everybody comes with their own complexities and that isn't a bad thing. The word family usually causes us to think of blood relatives, genes, parents or lack thereof. When I think of family I imagine the happy orange juice commercials from long ago; Mom wearing an apron and a smile in the kitchen; Dad sitting at the head of the table with his reading glasses on, newspaper in hand and a cup of coffee within reach; Son and  Daughter, their eyes twinkling with love and adoration as plates full of breakfast food appear in front of them. Someone told me this is the "Million-Dollar Family," and in my opinion that's just too fucking perfect.

No family is an OJ commercial, but they are forever.

When I think back to the last time my family was really happy it's not easy. 

My Grandma detests the term, "broken family", but if the shoe fits...

I know the saying goes, 'family means well,' but since we're all human, we can all make mistakes.

I recently decided F A M I L Y stood for, Forgiving All Mistakes, I Love You.
Then I thought, maybe there's something out there that tells me what family really stands for.
A quick Google search brought me to AcronymFinder.com
Family can also mean:
-Forget About Money, I Love You
-Father And Mother, I Love You
-Forever, Always, Mine, I Love You
-Forget About Me, I Love You
-Family Always Means I Love You
Seeing this last one made me wish I had spent more time working on my acronyms growing up. Forgiving mistakes is just one of a million things families do for us. Forgiveness comes from a place of love and understanding. Even though we may not agree with the things our parents, siblings or even our bosses do, we respect their decisions and accept we are still part of something much larger. Family isn't great because of your bloodline, no - that's science. The greatest thing about family is not the incredibility of dark hair and blue eyes either. It's not buying a home, sharing stories or the chance to make fun of each other.

Over time I learned family is not so much a group as it is a feeling. 

Those few people you can stand to be in the same room with, while the TV is on in the background and no one is watching it - that's Family.

The after-work dinner or drinks with your colleagues, when everyone wants to talk about the job but no one wants to be the first to bring it up - that's Family. 

The greatest part about family is they're your people.