26 Minutes

That's the length of a nap.

It's the age I think many really stop and wonder how they are going to navigate their way through adulthood. Should you start investing? Take a trip? Buy a lottery ticket? Get a tattoo? Start your own business?

At this point you might have:
- learned how to be in the workplace
-experienced an intimate relationship
-lived with someone other than family
-traveled to another country 

And if becoming an "adult" begins at the age of 20-21; once you can legally consume alcohol in the world, then in your thirties, surely you should be close to a career.
And yes, there are a lot of exceptions which include people starting work at a younger age, therefore starting careers in their early-mid twenties.

And there are other situations too.

For the sake of this post, let's say you come from a family who supported your decisions and helped you pay for your first car or college tuition. Let's say you had a public education from kindergarten to graduation and wanted to be a journalist. Your 17 or 18 years of experience on this planet are allegedly enough years for you to determine what to be for the rest of your life. 
One night, you're just about finished college and want to celebrate with your besties. In a couple more months you'll be twenty years old. You decide to go out, hit downtown and get some drinks. First stop is the liquor store. A six-pack and a bottle of Jager. You decided to be the designated driver tonight; you weren't drinking anyway. The phone rings so you pull over into a spot marked for a handicapped person. The officer approaches your vehicle while you ask your girl on the phone if she's working the club and can get you guys in tonight. You look at the clock and it says 10:36PM. 
From the corner of your eye you see a badge on a shoulder and think nothing. Instead what comes out of your mouth is, 'Oh! I'm not parking here I'm just making a phone call.' "NO. YOU'RE NOT PARKING HERE. HANG UP. TURN OFF THE ENGINE AND GIVE ME THE KEYS." It wasn't one of those security guards you find sometimes in parkades. The police officer throws your keys on the outside of the windshield as you step out of your car. Your friend seated in the backseat was asked to open the plastic bag which had your beers in it. A second police officer finds your other friend in the front with his finger on the open bottle of Jager. Open? You look over at him and your face must be pissed because he immediately looks down. This is what you get for being the designated driver? No. This is what you get for parking illegally. 'I am so stupid.' you think to yourself as the officer flips through his little black book of codes for the one that references parking in a handicapped stall. "Are you cold? You're shaking." He says to you, one eyebrow perked up. And you, standing there with your arms crossed in a tank top over a neon yellow lace bralette say something like, 'no. I should be petrified. I've never felt so stupid in my life. I'm the D.D. I'm usually responsible.' And you can't remember if you see him smirk or not but he calls over to the second officer and asks if he can remember the violation for parking in a handicapped stall. The second officer is in the middle of tossing a can of beer across to your friend about 5 feet, watching him open them as they blow up. He threw each beer one by one and watched them foam all over your friend as he poured them out, no doubt there was a smirk on that officer's face. You keep wondering if they're going to arrest you, or take your car away. The officers each write one ticket for open alcohol in public and hand one to you and your friend. You get another ticket for parking illegally. You thank the officer and get back in your car. The three of you pull out of the parkade and turn left, back towards the liquor store. It's 11:02PM.

..
The meaning of the number 26 is wealth and prosperity. Considering the world over, I'd say that both of those things attract the majority. So I guess if you see the number twenty-six you should prepare for rewards or money?

Maybe, maybe no. It's interesting if you wanna get into numerology.

So This is Christmas...

I woke up this morning around 05:45. The house was swollen with darkness and I couldn't tell from the bedroom whether or not it snowed more overnight. It's Christmas Day, -15°C.



Instead of getting out of bed then I turned over a couple times. I tried laying on my back. I curled up in an almost-fetal position to see if I could zip back down to slumbertown, but nope. I tossed some more and eventually found myself awake again at 7.



My phone blipped to tell me I've been sent a text message. I walked from our room to the kitchen and straight over to the stove to grab the empty kettle. It's not easy for me to avoid coffee in the first two hours of waking so there I was. Soft snores from our room kept me from dozing off as I sprawled on the couch to wait for the sound of boiling water. 2 years ago on this day, the source of the snoring asked me to marry him.



But for now let's rewind a bit; or as my godson says: fast-backwards, to January 2019.

On the 3rd we were to land back home in Calgary from Bangkok, via Hong Kong to Vancouver. I remember getting to Suvarnabhumi Airport the morning of January 3rd when we left, thinking of my family back home and the friends and colleagues I couldn't wait to share stories from my trip with. We were waiting to board and I happened to notice an airplane pull up at the gate behind us. Not even ten minutes later, that plane disappeared. What felt like all of a sudden, passengers around us began trekking past our seats toward the escalators and we had to guess they were all on the same flight. Our flight's gate changed. No announcement, no signage, no BKK staff to guide us. It was follow the leader till someone could explain what's going on. And that someone happened to be one half of a gay couple from Toronto, Canada. Shoutout to these guys who were so insanely cool about the whole thing. And by whole thing I mean the flight information display system that read: "INDEF. DELAY" next to our flight number once we got downstairs to where the action was. Indefinitely delayed in Bangkok. After spending nearly ten hours at the airport that day we finally departed for HKG.



We were told in Bangkok by the Cathay Pacific staff, our flights could only be scheduled to Hong Kong, not Canada where our family was waiting to collect us from YYC. And yet on the plane to Hong Kong, after landing, we got to chatting with the girls seated in front of us about the whole thing and they were heading back to Toronto. The funny thing is the staff in Bangkok scheduled them on a flight to YVR, to get back to YYZ. The flight to Vancouver was scheduled to leave at 01:20 that same day, but by the time we leapt off the plane and ran to the desk for assistance it was completely overbooked. It was after midnight at HKG when we landed and the airline put us up in Regal Airport Hotel with the rest of the stragglers. 14 unexpected hours in Hong Kong after traveling for three weeks is nothing, right? I'll admit the buffets were absolutely phenomenal, OK.

In the end we lost two days but made it home, safely, eventually, and thankful on Saturday January 5th 2019. What a trip!



February was the month I renewed my first mortgage. I was 22 when I bought my townhouse, working in marketing and social media relations. That year was maybe the last good year for making money in O&G. My stepdad had his second cancer treatment on February 13th and we were starting to look at venues for our wedding next year. My fiancé turned 39 on the 22nd. I planned a surprise overnight in Banff at Rimrock Resort & Hotel. We went skating at the high school in the afternoon and spent the night feeling like kids in a mansion. February for us is a month of marking.



March turned out to be a busy month. I barely remember it, but I think I sold 7 machines which was nice. April felt much the same, aside from the Alberta general election, when I felt the province start to turn negative. Over the years I found that April tends to be a period of time where you're either planning for summer events or reflecting on the winter season past. At the end of April we began conducting interviews for a "Junior" Technician - someone we could train to work on; install and repair our equipment. Unfortunately we had 90% overqualified candidates apply for the position. I remember some of their faces when my boss told them the starting wage: minimum. Some of these guys were used to camp money, had APEGA certification, or decades of years working in a technician role. This was an eye-opener for us, but not more than my co-worker who had moved to Calgary from Syria not even a year before. She worked for 9 years as an electrical engineer at a top firm in Damascus. She was mortified to say the least. It's no secret newcomers to Canada must have their foreign licenses and certificates recognized by WES or ICAS.

We hired a male who didn't last more than three weeks. My boss pulled the plug one morning and had a runner-up start later that afternoon. I'm happy to say he's still with us as of May 28th.



June was the start of summer 2019. Finally. The Baseheads slopitch team was back in action Mondays and Wednesdays at the Aero Drive diamonds. It felt so good to be out there on the shale with our pals and especially now, with winter well underway this week it's not hard to miss the feeling. What else? My godson turned twelve. I'm so in awe of his intellect. He is thoughtful and curious and loves to cook. I brought him to a sushi-making class and we learned a lot about the history and tradition of Japanese culture at Kinjo thanks to Bobby and Ted.



At the end of the month my boss invited us all over to his place in Okotoks for a year-end BBQ.

We hit (surpassed) our target of 2m and the beers were on him (thanks Toolshed!). The next day I flew to Vancouver for a well-deserved break and much needed catch up with MY Godmother. She's lived there nearly as long as I've been alive and with my birthday on the 3rd there was much to celebrate. Happy Birthday Canada. Happy Birthday Me. After snacking and chatting and smoking and laughing I flew home refreshed and rested and ready for next year.



The following week on Friday, we had been invited to my step-brother's house for dinner because his girlfriend's sister and her fiancé were in town for the first time to check out Banff, The Calgary Stampede and more summer fun in Cowtown, Alberta. Being Friday, work doesn't end until 6pm or later so they knew we'd be the last to arrive. I can still hear my Uncle Barry yell from the kitchen as we opened the door, (I never ring the bell when I go to my siblings' houses) "Hold On, Hold it!" And there was my step-brother's girlfriend holding a chalkboard with SURPRISE - We're Married! written. My reaction was stifled by disbelief though I dared not show it and yelled back, CONGRATS while giving her a hug. They were married Wednesday in their living room with the dogs as Maid of Honour and Best Man. Our parents were a little more shocked than us kids who tried our very best to be as supportive as possible. No one except for her sister and her soon-to-be husband knew about it.



In August our cousins were married just west of Qualicum Beach on Horne Lake. Wow! It was truly a magical day filled with love, yard games, dancing to Whitney Houston and a midnight pizza party.  The next day we took a drive to Coombs, BC where they have a well-known attraction called Old Country Market -a.k.a. Goats on Roof with, you got it: Goats on the Roof.



With back-to-school, new television shows starting up and most things being released I've always considered this next month to be quite enticing. Enter tradeshow season September. As a company we attend Western Imprint Canada held each year at the BMO Centre for the garment and decorating industries. For the first time in what felt like ages, we had a strong team and culture to bring with us to show off. We even celebrated our co-worker from Syria's 1st year with the company. Possibly the best part was meeting Marsha; the youngest person to be given a license to marry people in Alberta.



Okay, I take that back. The BEST part of September 2019 was my Premium flight to LAX for the best bachelorette party I could imagine. And what happened in West Hollywood stayed there.



October and November were hustle months. I spent a lot of time researching vendors, photos, ideas, food and more ideas. Knowing that December is not the busiest time of year in our company I wanted to ramp up some business to make up for the loss in revenue. If I had a dime for every time someone told me to "Check Pinterest" I'd have enough money to pay for at least 1 avocado toast. Needless to say we are very much looking forward to our big day.



Back to December. The month started with a phone call to my grandpa to wish him a happy birthday. He never answered. I left a voicemail. Two days later my tenant tried calling me. I missed it.

When I finally phoned him back he told me there's a flood at my condo. It wasn't a joke, I learned.

In the end I'm truly lucky to have the most supportive mother in the universe. My partner's parents are loving and thoughtful. They are a blessing. And today as I sit here typing away on Christmas Day I'm thankful. I'm happy, and I'm looking forward to closing off 2019 in the book of life.



The text message I received this morning just after 7 was from my high school English teacher. She sends me a holiday wish each year around Christmas, often the morning of. It's often the littlest things that make the biggest impact on us. I hope you'll take time to reflect on your year too.

Merry Christmas.

What is my job?

Nearly 28 months ago I started an adventure. What I thought was going to be an interesting industry, turned out to be a fascinating circus of large-format equipment, print technology and signage. I have learned so much at my job and yet I still feel like I know next to nothing today.
Large- or Wide-Format Printing is defined as a printer that prints on large paper, which can range from three to fifteen feet in width. These machines usually use inkjet technology, and are capable of printing on a variety of substrates, including but not limited to: vinyls, banners, papers and canvas.
I love this world. But when I started it, I had no idea what it was.

Two years ago I accepted a role with a national company involved in selling and servicing digital printing equipment and medias for signmaking. We are that in-between B2B/B2C organization which means I see walk-in customers asking,
"Do you sell vinyl here?"
And I receive phone calls from our regular clients saying, "I'll get my usual bundle please."
Bundle refers to a roll; normally 54"-64" in width, and at least 150 feet long, of printable vinyl and overlaminate. And though some are not at all educated in signage and print, I love my customers equally.

In 2016 I was still a bit upset about being kicked out of the car world. After my marketing gig with Toyota ended, the natural thing for me was to get back behind the bar. At the same time I was concerned about flipping work schedules - no longer bathing in banker's hours, I would start at 4:00 pm and finish around midnight. I wouldn't see my boyfriend until Sundays (if I wasn't scheduled to work, that is). But quickly I fell back into that familiar routine of taking care of others.

Bartending is an intimate profession. I have met very few career bartenders. I guess because it's not a lifestyle most people crave. I envy them. Bartenders hold a special place in the hearts of their customers. They are often good listeners. And usually available in the middle of the night if you need to talk.
So I went back to bartending and suddenly felt needed again.
I developed regular visitors like Pat, a Dad of twin tree-year-old boys from Oshawa, ON. Pat worked for a company that dealt with speedometer/odometer conversions for vehicles imported and exported to and from the USA and Canada. Matt, a single, "Storm Chaser" who worked for an international Dent Repair company. His job was literally to follow thunderstorms around the globe and contract vehicle repairs. Ethan's father or father-in-law was the owner of an import/export company in the US and he would come up at least twice a month to purchase cars at weak, Canadian dollar prices. I learned a lot about a lot of people but the majority were involved in automotive industries. It felt like I just couldn't escape the car world. But I wasn't going back.

Two years ago I said yes to an opportunity. I said I was, Okay with $14.00 hourly wage to start. After three months I received a small pay rise and continued to learn and work, keeping my head down. I grew into the role of "Telemarketing Sales/Customer Service Representative." I went to Red Deer, Brooks, Edmonton, Lloydminster, Lethbridge, and Toronto. I was given a company cell phone to be more efficient. And I thought I was working really hard that first year. Then I missed my target. I was expected to sell $800,000.00 and I sold $679,834.00. And it still bothers me to this day.
Last year I accepted a target of 1M. I have exactly two weeks to reach it. And without a doubt this time, I have done nearly everything in my power to get there. I have worked late, I have started early and I have gone miles beyond my remit. Not for any other reason than wanting to meet that goal. To prove to my owners, and myself, that I can set and meet targets effectively.

I don't make tons of money today but I do love what I do. I would not trade being part of a team that looks out for each other, for anything. I can tell when my colleagues haven't had enough sleep. And I'll pop in a K-cup for him/her. When I closed a massive deal, my co-worker's Mom made a cake. Our Manager brings me a Growler of my favourite beer to thank me for my hard work. You cannot put a price on healthy work-life systems. I have access to a safe space and opportunities for a lifetime now. My job is simple: develop the business; keep everyone motivated, educated and coming back. I get to create promotions, plan events, and if for some reason I don't feel like working, it's easy to say so. Even though my job is challenging, it's not complicated. It's people. And people need people.

Dear Don

I wish I knew you the way other people do. You are a man of many talents.

Wishful thinking,
Sharp looks,
Dazzling personas,
and the ability to change the tone of a room from one extreme to the other.

For a long time I wondered where to be involved in your life. Growing up in a generation that has seen upgrades in technology come and go has its perks but it also has its disadvantages... I've been discovering how to grow and make myself more inventive. It's something that comes so easy for you. Image.

You view yourself in a different light, almost, in a different lens. Untouched but wild.

Tomorrow is a new day, with a whole new set of rules. One can only hope to be more excited.

There once was a man named, Don who never set foot on the lawn
without his whole crew, whose names nobody knew, except maybe the little one con.

Truth is hard to hear. Get it together and wish, look, pray for the days you can't dream of.

Dearest, darling, Don.

The Procrastinating Bride

It took me a little while to get used to the fact I'm getting married.
As a kid I wasn't one to dream up scenarios of my Prince Charming, or the Big Day.
I wouldn't call me, "girly".
Feminine but... white wedding dress, femme?

Sure, I've thought about tossing the garter into a small crowd of single women, but only because it goes against the status quo. No - I did not mean bouquet.
No one is going to tell me what I can and cannot have at my wedding. Who says it should been in the summer? Not me. Who says I need to have a "theme"? Not I. Who said a wedding has to be a one-day event? Nobody I want to know.

I guess the greatest thing about planning your wedding is you can take all the time you need.
It is your wedding after all.

We even waited nearly a full year to choose the date.

I thought for a long time about the date of our wedding. I wasn't sure that it should be on a Saturday. Saturday weddings are fabulous but the Sunday morning after? Yikes, no thank you!
The date had to include either a 2 or an 8 and when it doubt, 'try both' is my motto. And 28 it was.

Lucky for the procrastinating brides like me, there are a bunch of helpful websites, apps and tools online for the very purpose of planning a wedding. While I have said 'I want someone to plan the wedding for me', if I'm honest, I don't need someone else to plan our wedding.
I just need an Assistant Wedding Planner.

But first things first: Where do you have your wedding?

Today we can use our smartphones to easily search for popular, local wedding venues. Actually, we use our phones for everything: advertising; paying bills; sharing photos or video; assets and goals.

A quick search on Google for: How To Plan a Wedding, gives you a long list of To-Do's starting up to sixteen months before the wedding date. The Number 1 being a wedding folder or binder to keep everything organized (or at least together).

My wedding binder started as a sketch book. I made a couple notes, a few lists and Voila! 
I had nothing.

Number 2, and possibly the most important component when planning a wedding is the budget.

Budgeting your wedding is a tough one. It's important to answer a few tough questions before deciding how to spend money on your wedding.

Do you have any savings? Okay, maybe just one tough question... but let's get real, money makes a lot of things easier. And if this is your first wedding then you probably want it to be incredible.
And if you ask me, I'd like it to be my last one too.

But if your wedding is in the winter and you'd like to have real flowers in attendance but you live in a "winter city" you'd be charged more for flowers then, right? So you have that cost to consider.

And speaking of attendance, if you are having out of town guests it's a good idea to consider finding them accommodations. Then there's the time off work you'll need.

If you asked me two months ago, Guest List should be Number 1, Venue would be Number 2 but then that bumps Budget down to Number 3. Or is Budget Number 1 and Guest List Number 2 and Venue Number 3?

Fuck...
Good thing I just started?

After having attended many, many weddings (7 in 2014 alone) I can certainly say the budget will get you your dream venue, or perfect attire or epic menu. I have seen weddings cost anywhere between $5,000 and $95,000 in Calgary. Some of the coolest and craziest things will happen at weddings.

People today are having big, bouncy castles at their wedding receptions. I think I only love this idea because my younger brother and I share a birthday month, so Mom and Dad always celebrated us together with a backyard BBQ featuring a bouncy house. Every kid who lived within two blocks would be there. It's like getting married in a tiny town, where everybody knows everybody and everyone's invited.

One of the most difficult things about getting married is finding the venue. I can't speak for those of you who have been waiting for the opportunity to plan your main event all your life. But I wasn't one of the kids who got married on the playground in elementary. I think I was actually the officiant.

And it wasn't so much that I had never thought about getting married before, as it was about becoming someone's wife. Because being a bride is all fine and dandy but what you're really doing is committing to someone for the rest of your life.

It's one of the wildest things for me, to see people become engaged and married and then separated and divorced in the blink of an eye almost. What are you doing to each other? Life is short.

You can't waste too much time planning your wedding(s).

Virtual "Coffee Talk"

A bunch of people are talking about the upcoming Alberta Election. I usually try not to involve myself, to be honest. But there's just something about this year's provincial election that seems to be pretty important.
We won't get into it here.

I left you 2 years ago after sharing a story about my grandpa jumping off the roof to prevent his house from burning down. So I think that's where I'll pick up from...

The other night we spent the evening celebrating my Grandpa. He turned 80. Fucking awesome. And he looks incredible for his age; thinks he can do anything. Stubborn doesn't begin to describe a man who attempted to perform surgery on a lump that had formed on his own head.

This man is my hero.
Unlike a lot of people from his generation, he loves technology and finding out about new gadgets and how they work. Like most grandpas, he loves to fix things. Growing up, there always seemed to be a video camera in his hand. I'd recite poems, barely three-years-old, as he filmed me.
Then a few years later, I'd dance, and he filmed and filmed.
About 3/4 of the way through my routine, a slightly lower perspective as grandpa's arm grows tired.
My brother would be on camera duty next, followed by your motion sickness.
Somewhere from behind the lens our mother yelling, "You can't move it that fast it's ahg!"

Watching those home videos that night really put it into perspective for me. Back then it was a rare occasion, a holiday or special event that got Dad to pull the camera out from up top in the closet. Today we see everything through a lens.

We always have our phones in our hands. It's so important to get those likes and followers up.
Even politicians use social media. And successfully.
But the main thing is, I'm guilty of looking at my timeline throughout the day.
No matter what, I want to stay informed too.

People have a hard time checking out - as in "unplugging" from technology and social networks. Why?
It's so easy to scroll.
We like watching videos.
We get our news and entertainment.

But in an age of info overload, are we even listening?

My challenge for you then: come by for coffee. I want to share stories and be a listener for those who haven't had anyone to listen to them.
If you have a project, or homework to complete, bring it. Got a meeting to prep for? We can help.
If you want to meet someone new...
or if you just love coffee, won't you join me for Virtual "Coffee Talk"? 

And just wait until you hear a story from my Grandpa!

Time Warp

Today is Tuesday.
There are so many things that I could be doing right now, including:
-making myself dinner
-watching television
-writing with a pen
-drawing
-dancing
-scrolling aimlessly
-painting my nails
-listening to music
-texting someone
-buying tampons
-answering a phone call
-planning my wedding
-smoking a doobie
-reading a book
-finishing the green tea I made which is cold now.

The year is 2019 and it has been over 25 months since my last rant.
Did you miss me? Did you notice?

I have been working very hard, i promise.
The best is yet to come.