once a group of 50 people was attending a seminar.
suddenly the speaker stopped and decide to do a group activity.
so he handed a balloon to each person and told everybody to write their name on the balloon using a marker pen. then all the balloons were collected and put in another room.
now these people were let into that room and asked to find the balloon with their name on it within five minutes. everybody was searching frantically for their name, colliding with each other, pushing around each other. it was chaotic. and at the end of the five minutes
no one could find their own balloon.
now these people were asked to collect a random balloon and give it to the person whose name was written on it. within minutes everyone had their own balloon again.
the speaker began, 'exactly this is happening in our lives - everyone is frantically looking for happiness all around, not knowing where it is.
but our happiness lies in the happiness of other people -
give them their happiness; you will get your own.
and this is the purpose of human life.'
26.3.14
23.3.14
getting what you want; the Golden F's
is it strange that we seem to get what we want, but almost after the fact?
we can't find something we're looking for until we give up and settle for an alternative.
and once we've accepted the alternative we finally find what we'd been searching for.
or when we wait for the server to take our first order; which seems like too long.
and then the server proceeds to return to the table three times while we are eating to ask, 'how is everything tasting?', and 'is there anything i can get you?', or as you take that nearly-too-big bite of pasta, 'what do you think of the Chef's special?'.
we are single and free from the restraint that is exclusivity; free to do as we please, go where we want at whatever time we choose to do so. single as one can get, yet can get no one to notice the fact.
so we start to see someone, go out on dates.
and when this happens; when we become attained we get the attention.
is it ironic that we seem to get what we want, but only after?
i didn't want to be a girlfriend because i didn't know how to ask questions like, 'who are you talking to?' or 'what did you do last night?' and 'how many people have you slept with before me?'. questions that people seeing; dating; in a relationship together, ask all too often. i didn't want to be a girlfriend because i don't know how to fight about things that girlfriends tend to fight about. and i certainly didn't want to be a girlfriend if i had to sacrifice my freedom, my friendships (mostly male) or my family. the Golden F's.
Freedom allows for option. the option to do and say and think as we see fit. Friendships are an offer that many feel they cannot live without. some people get to have all the friends in the world, others have a hard time finding just one, but Family...that's different than the other; and you don't need to have friends to get what you want.
Family allows for opinion. the common interest, values and lifestyle. and a family makes sure that both Freedom and Friendship are upheld.
Lesson #1 to getting what you want - choose Freedom, find meaningful Friendships, and never forget about your Family, and where you came from.
we can't find something we're looking for until we give up and settle for an alternative.
and once we've accepted the alternative we finally find what we'd been searching for.
or when we wait for the server to take our first order; which seems like too long.
and then the server proceeds to return to the table three times while we are eating to ask, 'how is everything tasting?', and 'is there anything i can get you?', or as you take that nearly-too-big bite of pasta, 'what do you think of the Chef's special?'.
we are single and free from the restraint that is exclusivity; free to do as we please, go where we want at whatever time we choose to do so. single as one can get, yet can get no one to notice the fact.
so we start to see someone, go out on dates.
and when this happens; when we become attained we get the attention.
is it ironic that we seem to get what we want, but only after?
i didn't want to be a girlfriend because i didn't know how to ask questions like, 'who are you talking to?' or 'what did you do last night?' and 'how many people have you slept with before me?'. questions that people seeing; dating; in a relationship together, ask all too often. i didn't want to be a girlfriend because i don't know how to fight about things that girlfriends tend to fight about. and i certainly didn't want to be a girlfriend if i had to sacrifice my freedom, my friendships (mostly male) or my family. the Golden F's.
Freedom allows for option. the option to do and say and think as we see fit. Friendships are an offer that many feel they cannot live without. some people get to have all the friends in the world, others have a hard time finding just one, but Family...that's different than the other; and you don't need to have friends to get what you want.
Family allows for opinion. the common interest, values and lifestyle. and a family makes sure that both Freedom and Friendship are upheld.
Lesson #1 to getting what you want - choose Freedom, find meaningful Friendships, and never forget about your Family, and where you came from.
21.3.14
how to wake up in the morning.
the last time i remember having time to waste i was reaching over to turn my alarm clock off. i can't remember the time the clock displayed, or even what time i was supposed to get out of bed. i can't even remember getting out of bed. i never got out of bed.
the first time i remember having time to waste i was at the orthodontist. the all-too-obvious fish tank did nothing to comfort my nerves; diminish my wait time. i was barely eight years old and i had to have something glued into my mouth. there was a metal piece with two hooks that came out on either side of my eye teeth. and with a tiny croquet needle and little baby elastics i would, each evening before bed, attach a vertical bar that went from my forehead to my chin. i guess they called it a headpiece. i never got out of bed.
another time i remember having time to waste i was a little bit older but not much. every Friday my Grandpa would pick me up from school in his tow truck. most of the time we would go straight to the hair salon but sometimes we would make a stop along the way. back then i still ate meat so we would pick up Kentucky Fried (Popcorn) Chicken and i loved that shit. at the salon i would answer the phones and schedule the appointments. can you imagine calling your hair stylist and an eight-year-old books your cut, colour and blow dry? Grandma let me play hair dresser with the mannequin heads; wash, dry, curl, style, buzz. indeed one day i found the electric razor. she told me it was OK but she warned me that it would be the last time i played hair dresser. i had a blast buzzing that doll's hair off. and then i cried immediately after. and the next day. i never got out of bed.
the first time i remember having time to waste i was at the orthodontist. the all-too-obvious fish tank did nothing to comfort my nerves; diminish my wait time. i was barely eight years old and i had to have something glued into my mouth. there was a metal piece with two hooks that came out on either side of my eye teeth. and with a tiny croquet needle and little baby elastics i would, each evening before bed, attach a vertical bar that went from my forehead to my chin. i guess they called it a headpiece. i never got out of bed.
another time i remember having time to waste i was a little bit older but not much. every Friday my Grandpa would pick me up from school in his tow truck. most of the time we would go straight to the hair salon but sometimes we would make a stop along the way. back then i still ate meat so we would pick up Kentucky Fried (Popcorn) Chicken and i loved that shit. at the salon i would answer the phones and schedule the appointments. can you imagine calling your hair stylist and an eight-year-old books your cut, colour and blow dry? Grandma let me play hair dresser with the mannequin heads; wash, dry, curl, style, buzz. indeed one day i found the electric razor. she told me it was OK but she warned me that it would be the last time i played hair dresser. i had a blast buzzing that doll's hair off. and then i cried immediately after. and the next day. i never got out of bed.